it's a good thing for the predators that the prey don't have a voice
because if they did we'd have a different, much more negative
view of the nature of humankind
you only win the right to pray for your pets
when you become a vegan
most people love reality
much more than they love people
love is the polar opposite of capitalism
that's why in modern psychology, capitalism's spiritual advisor
loving unconditionally is seen as enabling
and summarily discouraged
old people get up in arms when we don't call them by their surname
but somehow still bristle against calling us by our correct pronoun
be wary of people who say you shouldn't want power
because you won't need it
in war you take up space when you move
in late-stage capitalism you do so when you rest
the internet is an accelerant
if you come to it having hope, discipline, and curiosity
it's going to aid in building your life
if you come to it having despair, ADHD, and an addictive personality
it's going to eat you alive
our brain actively blocks out our ability
to gaze into the spirit world going on all around us
just like it covers over our blind spot
in the middle of our field of vision
religion is a blade that cuts deeper
both in surgery to try and heal
and in tearing you apart
bipolar 1 is like riding an iceberg away from one of the poles
negative symptoms are the heat and the ocean
eating away at the edges of yourself until finally it comes for the center
what floated you is all gone so you drown
in a person, it's worse for them to be dead than sleeping
with God, it's the reverse
broken people are like broken glass
they damage others just by being damaged themselves
living in your head is like smoking
it's pleasurable
and the more you do it, the sooner you die
one thing about me that offends people is i'm on a fixed income
of energy and fortitude
for the majority of people
life is more like candy land than risk
people say gaining the world but losing your soul is bad
but what's really bad is having neither
(since COVID)
too little has been too much for me
why don't they have a dentist for the soul
because my soul is rotting away
more than my teeth
where is my crown?
because my nerve is gone
when I suffer, the worst is often felt after the incident
like a river that crests hours after the storm
i have this weird quirk where i never think the nukes are going to fly
during the day
only at night
the marriages i pray for end
on number four now
i have a coldness on the edge of my skin
that is not from the ambient chill
it's my body heat beginning to lose its contest with death
Christianity in America suffers from dysphoria
a religion meant for the poor
that is only largely available to the middle class and rich
old people get up in arms when we don't call them by their surname
but somehow still bristle against calling us by our correct pronoun
be wary of people who say you shouldn't want power
because you won't need it
in war you take up space when you move
in late stage capitalism you do so when you rest
goodness and God can be separated
just as a chicken's head can be severed from it's body
it will flail around surviving for a while
but it isn't a chicken for very long
people don't see the devil
because they're expecting something big but find something small
first the devil came for the pleasurableness of righteousness
then he came for the pleasurableness of sin
the internet is an accelerant
if you come to it having hope, discipline, and curiosity
it's going to aid in building your life
if you come to it having despair, ADHD, and an addictive personality
it's going to eat you alive
bipolar 1 is like riding an iceberg away from one of the poles
negative symptoms are the heat and the ocean
eating away at the edges of yourself until finally it comes for the center
what floated you is all gone so you drown
in a person it's worse for them to be dead than sleeping
with God it's the reverse
remember while not everyone believes in God they all treat you like he does
most people love reality much more than they love people
living in your head is like smoking
it's pleasurable and the more you do it, the sooner you die
despair is the sin of the receding lake
that dries up and uncovers all the other ones
(since COVID)
too little has been too much for me
i don't love God but i hate the vacuum left in his absence
we are only on one of three paths—hope, dope, or rope
the thing modern psychology hates the most
is the fact that nothing, nothing besides love works
for stemming the tide of mental illness
(and their atomized, professionalized view of things chafes against this)
love is messy
love is hard
love is awkward /love is uncomfortable
love takes too much from us and gives too little in return
love occupies parts of yourself
that could be better used to fit in
love hits your pain points
love is giving someone a ride
when you feel like reading a book about being an advocate
love can be met with coldness or even aggression
love poured out until you're empty may still not be enough to save someone
SELF LOVE HURRICANE
mister hurricane
with mark of Cain
big eyed I
in the center
all around me body and soul negative
words, gestures, and actions swirling
but inside the I
peace, serenity, and I'M SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU
FOR MAKING IT THROUGH THE SHIT YOU NEVER TALK ABOUT
what kind of drink can wash down this lump in my throat
because i can't even cry
what kind of drink can wash down this lump in my throat
because i can't even fucking cry
play your happy year playlists, because as bad as this year has been
it could be your best of the ones left
it comes as a surprise to no one
that abusers like to constrict the definition of what constitutes abuse
addictions are often just meeting needs in people's lives
in a way society refuses to sanction
where people can be real
(if it is only online they are going to be internet addicted)
where they can get platonic touch or the sensation of what it feels like
(if they can only find it in opiates that's where they're going to go)
old people get up in arms when we don't call them by their surname
but somehow still bristle against calling us by our correct pronoun
be wary of people who say you shouldn't want power
because you won't need it
no bets are better than bad bets
which means often you come out ahead by never playing
(be it marriage or business)
in war you take up space when you move
in late stage capitalism you do so when you rest
when being offered drugs
assume the person who can handle them isn't you
beliefs are like food—the ones that are the worst for you
are the most delectable
(truth often tastes as bad as it is good for you)
i won't say pride is the great sin but i will say it is a great sin
because it means that you win!
everything you see is a zero-sum game between power and love
so to claim a god to be all of both is just preposterous
being "normal" is the hardest thing according to my little sister
because you're putting on the ruse of individuality
while attempting to conform to an ever shifting set of norms
being handed down by amorphous authority
(and they wonder why some people pine for religion
where the rules were cut and dried)
goodness and God can be separated
just as a chicken's head can be severed from it's body
it will flail around surviving for a while
but it isn't a chicken for very long
people don't see the devil
because they're expecting something big but find something small
modern psychology is like "focus on the here and now"
except when it demands us to believe our future to be a hopeful one
first the devil came for the pleasurableness of righteousness
then he came for the pleasurableness of sin
modern society leaves people in such a sorry state
that when they stop and think
they get depressed (thinking is branded rumination by psychologists
and summarily discouraged)
the internet is an accelerant
if you come to it having hope, discipline, and curiosity
it's going to aid in building your life
if you come to it having despair, ADHD, and an addictive personality
it's going to eat you alive
winners are part of the conversation when they're in the room
losers are part of the conversation when they're not in the room
the further people were from privilege
the more they liked working from home
because (and I should know because I am one)
they get treated like garbage in real life
bipolar 1 is like riding an iceberg away from one of the poles
negative symptoms are the heat and the ocean
eating away at the edges of yourself until finally it comes for the center
what floated you is all gone so you drown
in a person it's worse for them to be dead than sleeping
with God it's the reverse
marriages are born at the altar but die at the kitchen sink
despair is the sin of the receding lake
that dries up and uncovers all the other ones
some of the worst things in life aren't out to hurt you
they're out to worm their way into your head
to get your mind to bludgeon you with
(that's why the people who throw shade often hurt you more
than the people who throw punches
even though the legal system looks at the latter with more concern)
strange COVID times: survivor's guilt for being able to smell
every day being like a Star Trek episode
where something life and death happens
based on your actions
(spreading COVID to someone vulnerable)
yes COVID has been polarizing
i'm just interested in preventing people
from dying and becoming permanently disabled
but somehow in this twisted post truth world
that makes me the bad guy
truth doesn't disappear simply because you stop believing in it
the same way a fatal fall from a 17 story building
doesn't give a shit whether or not you believed in gravity
suffering smooths your edges like a stone eroded by the water
you are softer to the touch even as you become less useful as a tool
understand this about the younger generation:
community has been decoupled from place
sex has been decoupled from love
and trust has been decoupled from deference
remember whenever you lionize cutting people off for any or no reason
you are writing out a ticket to loneliness
because people now are less likely to invest in relationships
when they know the plug could be pulled at any time for any or no reason
(since COVID)
too little has been too much for me
three tragedies of life:
chronic pain when you're young
plastic interactions with people you were close with in middle age
and making it into old age with most of yourself long gone
i don't love God but i hate the vacuum left in his absence
exercise burns fat, suffering burns infatuation
perdition could just mean being thrown into your head
to stew in your own juices, for eternity
in the end a suicide note is often just an invoice
tallying all the times you've been treated like shit
we are only on one of three paths—hope, dope, or rope
a life is like a candle
the person's sweetness is smelled more after they've been snuffed out