navigating a world which feels like gravity is working in reverse

Expandmenu Shrunk


  • Tag Archives suicide
  • Tall Man or Slender Man (suicide spirit)

    I am really far from Evangelical Christianity but still really appreciate this Billy Graham evangelistic video.  Of particular interest to me was the part about the single mother who was thinking of suicide and someone in the church detected it, finding a “suicidal spirit”.  The reason that piqued my attention is because of a New York Times article about a faceless spirit stalking Native Americans via web comics and dreams that tells people to kill themselves and has already pushed some (already extremely vulnerable) youths to take their own life.  My theory now (assuming materialism turns out to be untrue) is people with already messed up lives and brains are more susceptible to the vagaries of the spirit world.  Even in my own psychotic break I saw demons.  The closest the Bible gets to a suicidal spirit is Mark 9:14-29 (though the conventional reading is epilepsy).

    This applies to people on the spectrum because they are much more likely to have suicidal thoughts than the general population.  Why this is I’m not sure, maybe the stress of making it in the world, isolation, a history and presence of ostracism, rejection by the church, etc..



  • Opt-In

    I think life should be opt-in instead of opt-out.  At the end of every year one should be allowed to decide whether one’s existence continues.  And if one doesn’t they should be allowed to give their credit to someone who does.  For example someone who didn’t want to live anymore could opt out of life and give it to someone dying of cancer who really did.



  • gramblings on “aid in dying”

    “Aid in dying” is often dressed up in compassionate cloths when it’s really just a way for the state and private insurers to save on end-of-life care (which comprises a large chunk of healthcare spending).  The state would never leave people the power to conveniently and painlessly end their own life.   It’s in the state’s power to pull you into (capital punishment) or push you away (suicide attempt hospitalizations) from death.  They would never give this power up.  Imagine, after being denied badly-needed pain treatment, you could just walk into a place and be put to sleep like a dying house cat.  You could never do this because as an able-bodied citizen you still have the potential and obligation to be a net gain for society.  However, once you are enough of a net drain on society “aid in dying” options open up.  Unsurprisingly I buy arguments from disability rights organizations like Not Dead Yet.  It’s human nature not to give people power over their own death.  Even if you enact a law that pretends to it doesn’t magically change human nature.  It’s like enacting a law banning sex and expecting everyone to remain chaste.  Liberals have a lot of good ideas but don’t have a firm grasp on human nature, specifically the depravity of man.



  • The Daily Mail reports that in 2012, 14 people with “severe psychiatric problems” were killed by lethal injection, a figure that rose to 42 in 2013.

    This is wonderful news.  Terminal mental health problems are gaining parity with terminal physical problems.  I know if assisted suicide were an option I would seriously consider it.  It’s sad but 10 to 15 percent of people with bipolar disorder off themselves so assisted suicide gets to be a very thorny issue for us.  Because mental suffering makes us want death but because the desire comes about via a fucked up brain we aren’t allowed to do it (verses desire coming via a fucked up body).  There are really no good answers for this.