Psychology is not dispensed in age appropriate ways.  For example as a 35 year old male for someone to tell me not to let my vocational failure define me is laughable.  Pass 30 as a male and what’s on your W2 does define you and determines whether you make guy friends or have success dating.  And I find this sort of comforting, knowing however messed up my head is that number is all that matters.  Now a 35 year old women does not have it so good.  What is going on in her head has more ramifications on how people see her and ultimately how her life turns out.  It’s on her to make her brain perform the tasks to build a life and that makes for higher rates of mental illness because the world is very cruel to women, more cruel to them than men (or at least cruel in different ways).